Am I being groomed?

Sometimes I wonder if our pets are grooming us for a life with kids. I know you are a parent so you’ll be able to tell me. Let’s put it in bullet form for you:

  • Dog whines at 3:00 am because she’s thirsty or wants to go out for a pee
  • Cat pukes in bedroom at 5:00 am
  • Dog is hungry but will not eat until we find her little green ball.
  • No, not that little green ball, the *other* little green ball that looks *exactly* like the little green ball that you found
  • Little green ball lands next to the cat so the dog stares at the ball for cat to throw it
  • Cat ignores dog request
  • Dog has a bark fit because cat is ignoring her
  • Cat ignores dog request
  • Dog nibbles on cat because cat is ignoring her
  • Cat cries and hides in the tub
  • Cat is hungry but won’t eat the food that is in his dish so he steals food from the dog
  • Dog barks at cat for stealing
  • Cat cries and hides in the tub
  • Dog follows me into the washroom; otherwise, she’ll cry at the door
  • When dog is sick she looks super small, doesn’t eat, and whines, but can’t tell me what’s wrong so I feel helpless
  • Dog looks super sad when I leave
  • Cat and dog come to the door when I come back home and they are super happy to see me
  • I step on cat puke
  • I step on dog toy
  • Cat and dog stare at me when I’m talking to them and then they go and do exactly the opposite of what I said!

What’s your verdict? Being groomed or not?

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  1. #1 by neeroc on April 4, 2012 - 11:40 am

    Yes. But fair warning – they don’t stop after you have kids. They don’t even stop even after your kid stops waking up at all hours of the night. I love the sibling rivalry bits, it sort of makes me want another pet…or another kid *g*

    • #2 by FairyWithT on April 4, 2012 - 12:05 pm

      Oh boy! I guess I’ll never get to pee alone again 😛

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