FairyWithT

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The 7 No-No Questions

There are 7 questions that should be out of everybody’s repertoire of “small talk” questions. These are questions that only very close friends/relative should be allowed to ask, and that, if they are REALLY close, then they already know the answer and wouldn’t dream to ask them. All in all: STOP ASKING THESE QUESTIONS!stopsign

These questions are extremely personal and can really poke the finger in raw feelings. Think about it! I have complained about them before and get the ridiculous answer of “those are typical questions”. I don’t care that they are typical, stop asking them, just stop.

Oh yeah, I should tell you the questions, shouldn’t I? 😛

1. When are you going to find a boyfriend/girlfriend? Typical question from a grandma or a friend of your parents. Imagine how this question feels on someone that feels inadequate and with low self esteem? Blow to the gut!

Then you find a better half. You’ve been with him for a while and people start asking:

2. When are you moving in together? Immediate thought: “Well, just last night I ate a vat of ice cream after an argument turned ugly when I asked him that exact same question for the tenth time!” How do you think this person will feel about your question? I’m sure she’ll say “Not yet, sometime later” with a big smile while inside she is thinking “SEE?! Even the neighbor of my twice removed cousin thinks it’s time to move in!”

You move in to a nice apartment and your other half gets laid off, things are tense at home because there is not enough money coming in. And your sister’s friend is left alone in the same room as you so she decides to go for small talk:

3. When are you buying a house? Answer “One day :)” Thoughts: “Money doesn’t grow of F%#&^ trees, you dweeb!”

What if you do get the house? Well, of course everybody and their dogs are wondering:

4. When are you getting married? That’s quite close to question number 2 if you ask me.

And so, you get married. You would be surprised to what this does to people. Some even ask it during your wedding reception:

5. When are you having babies? “Why don’t you let me consummate my marriage first? :)” I think this is the big mama of loaded questions (HA HA! “big mama”! Get it? Get it? Ok, move on…) This is an extremely personal question. Some people do not want kids, for them, it can be a very annoying thing to explain and could make them second guess themselves. But what happens when you or  your partner cannot have kids? That is a constant painful reminder every single time you ask.

Then if you do have a kid you get questions 6. When are you having a 2nd, 3rd, etc baby? and 7. When are you getting the boy/girl?

It just never ends! Stop the pressure with the personal questions! We don’t go around asking people “When are you going to dye your roots?” or “When are you going to take a shower?” or “Are you planning on paying all your credit card debt any time soon?”, what about “When are you going to lose those extra pounds?”

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Not like most kids

From the mouth of a five year-old boy:

“I am not like the other kids. They all have ONE favourite colour. I have TWO favourite colours: blue and rainbow!”

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A violent story (Rated M)

There was once a happy gathering…

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Then a massacre happened!

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The murder weapon was found at the scene:

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The survivors gathered to celebrate life

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The end.

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Splinter meets finger

Recently a 5 year old came to me with a splinter in his right pinky. He kept holding it out to me asking for a band-aid. Anyways, after convincing him to close his eyes, I was able to pull the splinter out, add a ban-aid, a kiss, and he was just like new… well, he just needed to make sure of one more thing first:

  • Excuse, me?
  • Yes?
  • Is this my left hand? *holds out “injured” hand*
  • No, that’s your right hand
  • Phew! That’s good, because I am left handed

He then proceeded to tell me that we should have cupcakes to make his pinky feel better.

That’s one smart kid! 😉

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“Happy” is not the right word

People keep telling me “you must be happy now that Chávez is dead” Actually, no.

Do not get me wrong, I am not sad that he’s gone. He was, in my view, a terrible human being. But he was a human being none the less. He had daughters and friends and other people who I’m sure genuinely loved him. There is a phrase that says “Every death has to be respected but not every death has to be mourned” and I agree.

It is thanks to him that I had to abandon the country that I called home, leave my family, my MOTHER behind and move to a completely different country, with a different culture, views, and weather at the age of 23. However, I do not resent him for this particular incident; granted, I miss my family, I haven’t been able to hold my new niece, or hug my grandmother but at least I see them through Skype. Canada has given me a great quality of life, a wonderful husband whom I love with all my heart, and my own business.

Then, what do I feel about his passing? I feel HOPE, hope that the country can start the healing process, hope that I won’t be afraid of bringing my kids one day. Hope that my mom is going to be safe, hope that my family will be able to get whatever they want at the grocery store. Hope for a better future…

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You will NEVER

Due to my type of business, I get to talk with a lot of moms and sometimes I talk about something I’ve done. The response I always get is:

Once you have kids, you will NEVER do that again

I understand that it would be harder to do certain things like doing your own manicure, or sleeping 8 hours on any given night; however, the last one I got was after I mentioned what I was going to cook that night and that my husband would be happy because he would be able to take it for lunch next day. The mom laughed and said I would NEVER be able to make lunch for my husband once I had kids.

I must confess that these scary statements are great contraceptions. I’m just glad I don’t talk about my sex life! Although, *that* has to be possible since some moms have more than one kid 😉

Anyways, I want to ask all the moms out there: since you had kids, have you EVER been able to:

  • Wake up at 7:00 am
  • Do your own nails
  • Blow dry your hair
  • Go out for dinner with your spouse or a friend
  • Give your spouse left over dinner for his lunch the following day
  • Read a book
  • Have a picnic
  • Go for a walk
  • Have a 10-minute phone conversation with a friend or family member
  • Cook something that requires more than 10 minutes prep time

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The word you are looking for is “particular”

Involvement in twitter and having to interact with people has made me realize that I am an extremely weird particular person when it comes to food. What makes me think that? Let’s see:

  • When I eat popcorn, I have a little bowl with me so I can eat the crunchy part and save the soft part for later
  • I cut my stake in such a way that I always have a cube on my plate
  • The last part I eat on my sandwiches is the middle. Hence, I always put the best part in the middle, this is why bagels seem useless for me
  • Did you know that M&M, Smarties, and similar foods are tastier when you put the single colours in your mouth in even numbers? Yup, that way you have the same amount of awesome on each side of your mouth
  • The more the edges in a brownie, the better. However, the best piece of a sponge cake is the edgeless one taken from the middle
  • Desserts cannot have alcohol in them
  • Chocolate and ice cream can only be enjoyed if there are no chunks or nuts in them, that way they can dissolve in your mouth without interference
  • Raisin = Punishment
  • I rather hot and savory than cold and sweet. Therefore, soup and chip trumps salad and dessert. This also makes it really tricky to snack during the day
  • Hot brownie by itself = Heaven. Hot brownie with cold ice cream = Hell
  • Cinnamon makes coffee tasty but ruins cooked fruit
  • If it’s a dessert made with strawberry “flavour”, then yuck
  • I eat a LOT and really fast, yet I never seem able to finish more than half a plate of pasta
  • I could live off of soup
  • Breakfast if my favourite meal of the day yet I never know what to make
  • When I eat more than one flavour of ice cream, chocolate goes on the bottom and a fruit flavour (except strawberry) goes on the top
  • I do not eat bright blue food, as in Smurf coloured food, not blue corn blue since I consider that to be purple
  • I always eat whatever I don’t like first and my fav food last, that way I can have the best flavour last
  • I start my pizza from the crust
  • If I am eating at someone else’s house I will eat anything and everything they give me. This is the reason why I passed out once at a friend’s.

And now that everything is in a list form, I realize that I am ever more “particular” than I thought :/

Do you have any peculiarities when it comes to food/eating?

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